This happened all at once, or so it seemed. A convergence…
It was mid-summer and I was hurrying up the trail, late for my evening trek when I came upon a woman who was walking her dog. She stopped me and pointed out a deer at the edge of the forest. Suddenly, as if to underscore the deer’s presence, a big burst of thunder erupted overhead.
I am outta here! I announced to the woman! And just to be sure I was not interfering with her plans, I asked if I could walk back with her. Many people come to the trail to process their day, their emotions, their life, and I didn’t want to impose my presence, unless invited, especially when I did not know her.
We took a few steps and noticed a deer — that deer, the same deer — starting to walk alongside us, periodically darting over to the other side of the path. I had never seen this happen before, at least not in my 19 years of walking the trail!
We couldn’t really tell what the deer was after. Was she needing food? Hurt? Or lonely?
Do deer get lonely?
And then we realized the deer was fixated on the dog. The dog!
(I concluded the deer thought she was a dog out herding sheep!) The deer seemed so focused on the dog that we started to get a little scared. I had never been afraid of deer before, but that was when they kept their distance. They should be afraid of us, not the other way around, right? Well, that is human-centric and biased, I thought. But I was clearly in fear.
We started walking faster and faster hoping to throw the deer off our tracks, but instead she broke into a trot. She seemed to be getting more and more urgent, not letting us out of her sight. She raced back and forth across the path, almost frantic, changing sides, but never leaving our side and never taking her gaze off the dog.
I am not sure how, but after weaving and winding our way down the mountain, we eventually lost sight of the deer. I think it was by intention. We did not want to get in a standoff with her and the dog at the base of the mountain, or end up with her hovering by the car, asking for a ride. :)
The woman and I parted perplexed, determined to find out more.
Not long after our encounter, I heard reports from other friends with dogs that they too had been “tracked” by the deer. Later, I learned from an animal intuitive that the doe may have lost her fawn. She may have thought the dog was her baby. Or close enough to be her baby that she needed to find out for sure.
Interesting how this information changes everything.
They say you never know the whole story even when you think you do. I hope I remember this truth. The deer have grief too, we are all one.
In the coming days, I really started to miss the deer. Did she run off, head on to distant lands or get too close to the road? Weeks later, when I saw a dead deer on the highway, I worried it was her.
I was relieved when I finally saw the doe grazing on the trail again late one evening. She was solo, I was solo, and she did not chase me.
I like to think we recognized each other.
And then she was gone.
Perhaps she found her baby and moved on. The mother and baby are together. Existing in different realms perhaps, but together nonetheless.
At least this is how I will write the story. Yes, this is how I will write my stories, of love and connection.
~ KB